TTPMO: Christmas creep

Note to the world, particularly the retail world: Christmas is on December 25. That's December, people, the last month of the year. Not November, or October, or September, and certainly not August. Can we just get this straight? Because I am seriously pissed off by the fact that stores start putting out the holiday decorations before it's even Halloween. Give it a rest! We've barely gotten over the tinsel typhoon from last year, and you're already trying to shove more holiday crap down my throat? I'll tell you where you can shove your holiday crap.

Why do stores do this? Does it actually help to move the merchandise to have a bunch of reindeer in the shoe department when I'm still shopping for flip-flops? Does it make me more likely to spend money when I see I red and green and cheery lights and those creepy animatronic carolers waving their arms about like pasty white zombies moving through molasses? Or does it just make me more likely to head to the nearest bathroom to find a place to retch other than all over your two-for-one scarf sale?

Some would say that I'm not being properly moved by the Christmas spirit. To these people I say, it seems that the Christmas spirit has sold out to Disney and Coca Cola, and while I'm all for goodwill towards my fellow humans, I am certainly not moved by a four-month assault on my wallet. Nor should I be. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to my Thanksgiving preparations. Bah humbug!