Ridiculous? Maybe, but it's true. This is a bit of an addendum to something I said in yesterday's post, namely that sometimes it's harder to love and be honest with ourselves than to love and be honest with other people. Today's point is that it's often easier to be frustrated with ourselves than with other people when things aren't going right.
And things here aren't quite going right. I'm trying to learn something new, something that I've wanted to do for a long time and something that I should be good at because it's a combination of several skills that I have (at various levels of polish) in my arsenal. But putting them all together in a way that works has been very trying to me --- and also to my poor long-suffering husband, who has been helping me.
Right now, I need to take a break and recognize that I can't possibly get it perfectly right on the first try. I know that intellectually, so why is it so hard to recognize that viscerally? Until I do, unfortunately, I'm going to keep pissing myself off. Be perfect, self! Do it right the first time! I don't care that it's hard or that you've never done it before or that you're running out of time!
Grr. Time for some chocolate.
MANLY MEN Cakes
6 hours ago
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